Understanding Divorce

A Guide On What to Consider

Divorce has its challenges not only emotionally but financially. There are many aspects ignored during a divorce and when not addressed, they will resurface or come back to haunt us. When it comes to understanding divorce one of the first things one should ask themselves prior to seeking a divorce, is if, they have done everything necessary to keep the family together. In most cases people who are ready to divorce want out or escape from it. Unfortunately not too many people offer advice prior to marriage and or a willing to listen. However, you are here to have A Guide On What to Consider.

The Romantic Partnership Is Over

Although, you’re probably in a space of frustration, disappointment, anger, or disbelief. The fact is, one or both want out of the romantic commitment and or the responsibility of holding a family together. While this is the end of the romantic bond it is not of the relationship if you share children together. Keep in mind you will eventually have to share moments together for the sake of your children and it won’t be about you anymore. Don’t get stuck on what should be fair, because the only person you won’t be fair to are your children if you decide to act on your emotions toward your partner. Parenting is a long-term responsibility and partnership that both should be participating on. This bond doesn’t end with divorce.

Parenting Schedule

Children are entitled to spend time with both parents and their perspective parenting style. Although both parents should be aligned on how they want to raise their children keep in mind the reason of a divorce is because a lot of your ideas, perceptions, or rules don’t aline in the first place. This applies to children as well. Your children are not the possession of the parent who believes knows best. Children have their own ideas and desires. Don’t force children into dislikning the other parent or spending time with them if they are not comfortable. Don’t interfere in the participation of the other parent, it is morally and ethically wrong to deprive your children of the love and support the other parent can offer. Parenting schedules should be a team effort to spending time with children and expose them to each’s new lifestyle. However, this does’t mean the exposure of every potential new romantic partnership. Children are not often as excited of meeting new people as their parents may be. Be mindful that they need your support and not your emotional divorce disagreements or new romantic adventures. Allow children to bond with each parent as equal as possible. The responsibility doesn’t end with divorce.

Child support And Spousal Support

One of the biggest controversies in a divorce is child-support and spousal support. The first thing to understand is that child support is the obligation of both parents. Both parents are obligated to support their children and child support is based on each parent’s share of the responsibility based on income. If the higher income parent is the father, he will be paying more towards the support based on income and time spent with the child and if the mother is the higher income earner the same applies to her. Child support is not a punitive amount placed on either parent. Child support has guidelines for the support of the children on the lowest level possible. This means child support guidelines does’t include luxuries or entertainment. Each state has their own guidelines and accessible information on this topic.

Spousal Support

Spousal support is not a gift, it serves a purpose. This is to offset the accustomed lifestyle or to help the person receiving the support to seek better opportunities for the future. Spousal support is temporary and is based on the guidelines placed by the state you live in. Unfortunately, many couples argue intensely even after the divorce and will find ways to discontinue it. The person receiving alimony is most likely the person who set aside any career opportunities to invest in the family and to presume they don’t deserve anything is like saying the one with the successful career shouldn’t have accomplished it either. It took a team effort to have what was accomplished in the marriage.

Distribution of Assests

A 50/50 scenario is the ideal in any divorce however, many factors may apply depending on your state and what is considered marital assets. In a divorce you can both decide what is important to both and work towards an agreement that benefits both. The best agreements come from two people deciding what needs to be divided. Understanding your legal rights is important when the asset distribution is not evenly distributed.

The Agreement

An agreement between two people is ofter the best solution. If you need to reach an agreement use a divorce mediator to help you reach an agreement. The better prepared you are prior to filing yourslef or hiring an attorney for your divorce process, the less expensive it will be, saving you time and money.

Understanding divorce and what to consider will help you think about each step that most couples find difficulty navigating through. Be considerate of your choices and plan accordingly.

The information contained herein is not intended to be legal advice or should it be construed as legal advice. This is for informational purposes only. #divorcemediation #divorce